Nearly the end of the year, and nearly the end of my one word posts on the theme of Balance. I had a huge wobble this month. I tried to do too many wonderful things every day. Needlefelting the hare was terrific, but it really tired me. Later that week I realised I had to stop and rest. I sent my apologies to three groups, and stayed home, read a bit and slept a lot. It worked and on the Saturday thoroughly enjoyed spending time at Blenheim Palace with all my family, attending the Christmas market (cinnamon pancakes and mulled wine) and visiting the Christmas decorations on the theme of the Snow Queen. It was a special day.
So the lesson from all that? Well maybe I just have to accept that as one gets older, and even though I am in reasonable health, I do not have the energy and stamina I once had. Maybe instead of trying to do all the things, I become a bit more discriminating , not give up exciting things, but plan for the fact that I will need built in rest time.
The wobble was about ten days ago. I have pulled out of one more event in December. I will still try to do wonderful things each week, but these will be interspersed with days at home, and days when if I do go out , I go by myself and at my own pace. I love trying new things, meeting new people, and friends and of course my own rather wonderful chaotic family. I plan on saying Yes to lots of things, but will also spend time by myself. Is this what I meant by balance all along?
I started a new way to organise my time to help me achieve this. Sometime over the weekend I will plan my week. I have to use paper and pen being a tad old fashioned. I start with listing all the nice things for the week. Then I add in the chores, this morning changing the bed clothes and sweeping up leaves. I plan meals, and plan the downtime, which isn’t inactive time, I may go for a walk, or knit, read, cross stitch. I have also found if I work out what time I need to start to prepare meals I am less likely to change my mind on the food front, very guilty of saying I can’t be bothered to make that tasty casserole or whatever. And so far it’s worked. Only ten days I know, but I feel heaps better, more contented, less frenetic….I am enjoying cooking again.
And that takes me to next month. Christmas. I loved Christmas as a child and as a parent. Absolutely all of it. But.. and here’s the rub. I am the older generation now. My role has changed, and I want to enjoy my time as grandparent at Christmas, and the role is different. Mum and Dad are central to a happy family Christmas, and the last thing they need is an awkward older family member trying to muscle in. I can actually step back from all that shopping, cooking, decorating, wrapping, organising etc. So what I wonder is the secret of being the grandparent in the corner? I am lucky enough to have been invited by a son to spend Christmas Day with them. My Dad always donated a box of crackers to proceedings, so I have begun with that. I have made a Christmas cake, a small one, because I like Christmas cake , and I shall give half to the son who also likes it but whose wife doesn’t and makes a chocolate log instead. I’ll arrange to see family over the week before New Year, but for the rest I shall recharge my batteries with knitting, a huge pile of books and stay warm.
I’d love to know your thoughts on any of this. What to your mind makes the ideal grandparent? My sons loved my Dad and his skill was that he let them be, they went to him for his calmness, humour and lack of fuss. It sometimes felt unfair that he was favourite grandparent, as the others put in a lot more effort to entertain. I find your comments so helpful, so do please say what you think.
Joining as always with Carolyn and others who use a one word prompt to reflect on life. Link here-https://youronewordblog.wordpress.com/
Have a fabulous week.