Wool, Wiltshire and All Manner of Wonderful Things!

Balance-April

It’s the last Monday in the month, so time to review my one word I chose to guide me this year -Balance.

When you loose a lifelong partner, there is a need to rebuild a life full of meaning and joy. To let go of the past and continue to grow.

Over the last eleven months I have been extremely grateful to the local carers group for the activities they arrange for carers. The walk and talks, coffee mornings and craft sessions have been wonderful. My family have been amazing with trips to London, picnics, walks, help with stuff, cutting the grass, checking up on me , all so enjoyable, in short I couldn’t have had better support or love. Whilst the family fun will continue, I need to find replacement for the carers group, as their support will end in a short while now my caring days are over.

I am really thrilled that finally the local U3A group has opened up properly post Covid. I have been to an embroidery group twice, one poetry appreciation group session and made contact to join a walk group which focuses on learning the history of a town or village. First walk for me will be in May.

I stitched this twinchie at the last embroidery group. It’s gone off to Wild Daffodil as part of a group card for Helen who has suffered recent bereavement. Helen was our stitch book tutor.

I have also kept my eyes peeled for one off workshops.

Elephant stitched in a local library workshop.

These activities have all been enjoyable and I have learned that I can do several days of going out and about, having fun meeting new people, talking laughing, but afterwards I need days at home, being quiet, resting, sleeping, reading, doing the every day domestic jobs – cleaning, tidying, phone calls, letters, emails , or even as today, attending to my health – trip to the hygienist. Then I can be ready for what next…

I have got much better now at planning my meals and sticking to the plan. Where I still need to sort myself out is on regular exercise. I potter round the garden every day, but that is not the same as a regular walk… And I don’t know why I haven’t tackled this yet,

I am not even using my membership to the local gym/swimming pool, which I joined nearly a year ago. It is very close and I chose it because I could pop out for an hour to go there and safely leave Mr E for that amount of time. Maybe now my options are wider, it’s no longer so important to me. I don’t know. And it is expensive..,mmm

OK, so what for May? Various things to look forward too, Baby P’s Christening, a theatre trip and I have opted to have a meal before hand and Miss F is singing in a concert, plus aforementioned groups and hopefully the garden project will happen (awaiting delivery of materials).

And walking…..

I wonder if anyone has tips for keeping themselves healthy in mind and body please. Love to hear from you. Or do I just accept that my body knows best and if I sleep that’s what I need, and if I don’t fancy exercise then maybe my body still knows best?

Meantime do visit Carolyn for her link up for one word posts. Here, https://youronewordblog.wordpress.com/2022/04/24/one-word-april-twenty-two/

Comments on: "Balance-April" (37)

  1. Wonderful to read how you have caring for yourself and enjoying activities outside the home. I have yet to join any groups in Colorado but I am thinking about a local crafting guild, but I did go to a couple bag making classes this winter. I love walking everyday for exercise ๐Ÿ™‚

  2. If you figure out the walking let me know! I love walking and when we’re away we walk everywhere but for various reasons, at home and in in our village walking feels complicated, and often like one more thing on the to-do list. Balance indeed! I’m trying to find some quiet time after a busy few weeks.

    • I love walking, but sometimes it just feels like a chore, just like you say. Hope you find some quiet time, so important to well being.

  3. Lovely to see the twinchie – it is here waiting for a few more to join it.
    I too struggle with getting myself to do enough exercise and find that a walk has to have another purpose to it for me to feel sufficiently motivated. I have made a commitment with a friend to go for a walk every Tuesday and I have bought the Ordinance Survey App,(sorry – yes an App!) which has motivated me to try to find a different 3 to 4 mile walk each week. Wish we lived a bit nearer to each other. ๐Ÿ™‚
    I remember you were doing the Artists Way – maybe a walk could be combined with an Artist’s Date.
    Your positive, can-do attitude is always inspiring Cathy. Hugs from the south coast too!

    • Excellent ideas re walks. I am doing some hard thinking on the subject! Look forward to seeing others twinchies. Itvwas the perfect project for the embroidery group. I’m pleased to say I have made up the blank Made with Love stitchbook, and pinned something for every page, all ready now to stitch at future groups. Has to be easily portable. I am genuinely shocked by how many not started projects I have!

  4. I would build up slowly, a tip for new walkers Iโ€™ve heard is to walk to the nearest lamp post (or whatever) and walk back. Repeat to the one after the next day and so on. Small steps (literally!) and building up into longer distances. Itโ€™s also not trying to eat an elephant in one go, small bites. I donโ€™t really like that analogy but it does illustrate the point effectively, though I feel for the elephant!
    Email me if you want to wander around a nice garden etc soon. X

  5. You are doing so so well and I am so proud of you. It truly sounds as if you are balancing everything quiet well, and I need calm days after group meetings, especially if I got to meet a lot of new folks!

    One thing that is doing me a lot of good now is Yoga – you can do it at every age and maybe there is a group somewhere nearby in a community centre or something! Apart from that, we go on walks as well, and that IS a very good exercise for the whole body, after all. Are you doing your shopping on foot or is there a possibility of doing so? Maybe you could make that walk a little longer?

    • Thank you for this useful comment and encouragement. I shall be looking at how I can add in exercise into all every day activities. I am walking to the hairdresser this morning.

  6. Cathy – you have been working hard with your word lately! I love all of the activities you’ve been including!

    As for motivating yourself for exercise… I really struggle with that one, too. I constantly remind myself, no matter how much I want to skip an exercise session, that I’ll be so happy when it’s over. 1) because it’s OVER and I don’t have to think about it anymore; and 2) I’ll be proud of myself for doing it even when I didn’t want to. I also like to track it on my calendar (you know me!) because it’s fun to watch my progress.

    I hope you have a lovely May!

    • Bless you, thank you so much. I like the notion if just getting it done so that it’s over. Guess who loathed PE lessons at school!

  7. You seem to be building a very full life for yourself though you always seemed to do lots of interesting things. One thing I think is worth trying to include as you get older is what they call strength and flexibility exercise. I’m finding it more and more necessary to keep my body as I want it to be.

  8. Going Batty in Wales said:

    Well you may have found the ‘recently bereaved’ lot a bit morbid but I bet you inspired some of them! Whch is not to say you should keep meeting them! I do think that knowing it is coming and thinking about strategies is a huge help.

    There is no point in trying to do exercise you don’t enjoy as you will just avoid it (speaking from experience). The dogs ensure I walk regularly but they are a tie so it is a big decision to have one. Walking with a friend or a group might help and I like the idea of combining a walk with an errand.

    I too find I need interesting days with others then some time to be alone and catch up with myself. And apparantly elite athletes are now encouraged to have naps as it is good for them so you can use that as a good example.

    You are doing amazingly well at building a new life and should be proud of yourself.

  9. For the walks, I was also thinking of a dog, as Kate mentioned. And agree with Caroline that walking with a friend is always so much nicer than alone. Perhaps there are some people from the support group that would like to form their own continuing-to-get-together group?
    You are doing amazing things in such a short time, Cathy, and should be very proud of yourself! Lots of hugs ๐Ÿค— ๐Ÿค— ๐Ÿค—

    • Aah thank you. The problem with the group of no longer carers is they are so morbid. I did a coffee meet up with recently bereaved people but they were very stuck and not ready to move on. I think because we had twelve years from First diagnosis we had talked about end of life for both of us, and also what each of us would do, where the problems would be. We’d done the ground work so to speak. A lot of what I’ve had to do since Summer we’d covered so I knew what to do. So its surprised me a bit that I get so tired physically and mentally.. it will just take time.

      • How very wise you both were to lay the groundwork, so to speak. Too bad so many in your carer group hadn’t done that. Your next activities will appear in time, I’m sure. Meanwhile, resting as needed sounds a good plan! ๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿค—

  10. Cathy, I keep coming back to this line you wrote: “Maybe now my options are wider, itโ€™s no longer so important to me. I donโ€™t know.” Your posts always offer so much richness– this sentence gives me so much to think about. As for the exercise, I always benefit from committing to walk with a friend. Because even if I decide I don’t feel like it, I know she will be waiting for me

    • I am really looking forward to the group walk, and maybe I shouldn’t limit myself to just one group. My incredible father in law joined three groups, and even lead one aged 80 to Greece. Thank you for reading my post so carefully.

  11. Murtagh's Meadow said:

    You have been keeping busy. And making great progress with your new balance.

  12. You are making great strides in finding your new balance and building your new life a step at a time! Hugs to you!

    • Thank you. It’s harder than I thought. It maybe sounds odd now but we did talk about end of life, what we’d like, what we’d do if we were the one left behind, but nothing is as you imagine.

      • I’m sure it isn’t. It has to be so hard. We lost my Dad 5 years ago, and my Mom has been going through it as well. I don’t think anyone can understand it fully who hasn’t experienced it.

  13. I’m definitely in the camp of sleep if your body tells you to. As for exercise, you’ll be getting plenty from gardening and pottering about, so I’d just go with the flow. Then you might do more, anyway.

    As an example, today I was determined to walk into my local town – but the trip never inspires me when I am alone and have to, so I knew I would end up driving. However, I ended up going elsewhere (by car) to buy new curtains etc, which necessitated a certain amount of walking. Then after buying this much needed stuff, I felt inspired to try to find a wood. Not sure I did but the search led me to do even more walking, all without even considering it.

  14. Can you borrow a small dog to do walkies with? I do find my animals very helpful in alleviating the effect of years of long, long hours alone. First, Mouse, and now the Girls, who are endlessly entertaining. Maybe a couple of bantams in a small movable cage on the back lawn. Company, a friendly background noise and the occasional bonus egg!

    • You are right, dogs don’t let you miss walks. My two were real nags about their outings. Always put off poultry, don’t think in fact know I couldn’t dispatch them if they got ill.

  15. I love how you are forging a new path! Not easy, nor for the faint of heart… well done! I think your word serves you well each day as you clearly see your limits! Not all of us are so wise!

    Sending you hugs as well! XO

  16. I have no answers to your questions so am sending you Big Big Hugs instead โค๏ธโค๏ธ

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